OPEN CASE:  Veronica Mars

VM 3X03

Aired: 10/17/06

Wichita Linebacker: 2! 4! 6! 8! Who Do We Appreciate?

Review By Fotada

I have a fortune from a fortune cookie that I’ve kept for years, tucked into my car’s sun visor. It states, “Doubt is the beginning, not the end, of wisdom.” Oh, I can guess what you’re thinking. “Fotada, you didn’t get a fortune cookie, you got a platitude cookie.” But platitude or no, I’ve held on it to it because I like the concept. Doubt is not a weakness. It’s a good idea to ask yourself questions. In that spirit, in this review I’ll be asking many questions.

In this episode, Veronica asked herself some questions. Questions that, frankly, I was a little disturbed she entertained. Such as:

• “So how did people blackmail each other before email?”

• “You have a cell phone tracker which cost your dad hundreds of dollars. You went to the trouble of activating the GPS chip in your boyfriend’s phone, so is it a waste of your dad’s hard-earned money and your time if you don’t use it?”

Big Brother much, Veronica?

But like Trish, Veronica’s heart is in the right place.

Veronica works at the help desk. She helps people. She just wants to help. She helps the helpless. (Woops, wrong show!) A student asks for information about Jack London and mercury poisoning, and Veronica can answers with little hesitation.

Jack London contracted a disease called yaws while traveling in the tropics. The standard treatment of the time was a concoction which included mercury. We now know that mercury poisoning weakens the internal organs and has symptoms similar to those of lupus. One theory is that this so-called treatment contributed to London's death a few years later.

The doctor who treated London? I’m sure his heart was in the right place.

Some Questions Are Easy

On a sliding scale, where does a photograph of nearly nude students land between nudity and political statement? (This reminds me of the late Justice Potter Stewart’s comments defining what is and what is not pornography: “I know it when I see it.”)

Is the college experience about video games (like Guitar Hero) and binge drinking, or Martin Amis wheezing through a novel and Noam Chomsky reading the Havana phonebook? And, is weight-lifting an actual class?

When is sex romantic, and when is it a booty call? And who in the relationship gets to decide? Can it be both? Is having a boyfriend like eating black licorice? (“Dark and moody, but at that same time it’s fun, because it’s candy!”)

Veronica and Logan have a tense discussion that is riddled with questions. Two attractive girls from Logan’s Weight Lifting class call out, “So Logan, see you at the party?”

Veronica hackles are up. “New friends? What, do you guys like spot each other doing squat thrusts and stuff?”

Logan replies: “What is this? Jealous?”

The discussion continues. Veronica wants him to attend an art show. Logan declines, but he invites her over to “get political.” Veronica chides, “Really, how do you think that sounds?” Well honestly, Veronica, I think it sounds just dandy! But uh, you didn’t ask me.

The mystery of the week revolves around Kurt and his missing playbook. Who is Kurt? His football coach taunts him, “Instead of skipping meetings, why don’t you just quit? Focus on your philosophy full time! Read your Plato! Drink your espresso and eat all the cheese you want!” So, is Kurt a meathead or a scholar? A football player or a student? Can he be both?

If Kurt did read his Plato, he’d learn that the Greek philosopher wrote about the Socratic Method, a practice which involves asking a series of questions surrounding a central issue, and answering questions of the others involved. “Socrates generally applied his method of examination to concepts that seem to lack any concrete definition; e.g., the key moral concepts at the time, the virtues of piety, wisdom, temperance, courage, and justice.” (Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Socratic_method) Isn’t that neat?

Some Questions Are Harder

In addition to helping “friend of a friend” Kurt out of a jam, Veronica wants to help her old friend Weevil as well. She checks up on him at his current place of employment, the unfortunately named Jumbo’s Clown Wash, just as he’s grousing about having to wash yet another “spoiled bitch’s graduation gift from daddy.” Veronica says she does not resemble that remark, and Weevil inquires, “What about the bitch part?” She concedes, “That depends on who you ask.”

Logan asks Veronica where he rates, on a scale of one to ten. Veronica guesses, “One. Seven. Four?” Can a person equate to a number? What are the criteria? Is Logan an unreformable bad boy, or a reformable good man? Can he be both? Is this a sliding scale? On some occasions he’s a one, sometimes a seven, and sometimes a four. But, he’s really trying.

Keith believes Veronica has a thing for trying to reform unreformable bad boys. Uh. I don’t get it. The history of Veronica’s love life, besides Logan, includes Troy, Leo and Duncan. Troy definitely was a bad boy of sorts, with the drugs and the girlfriend on the side. Did Veronica try to reform him? I don’t think so, but I guess an argument could be made that when she helped him get off on the rape charges, that was her way of making a bad boy seem not so bad. But, were Duncan and Leo bad boys? Well, I guess that depends on how you look at it. Leo did a bad thing (sold murder evidence to pay for his sister’s tuition), but that was long after Veronica had broken up with him, so no reforming that I can see. And Duncan? Was he bad? OK, yes there was that minor thing where he “kidnapped” his own child. But did Veronica try to reform him? No, in fact, she assisted him with that little adventure. Later Duncan helped orchestrate Aaron Echolls’ murder, but to our knowledge, Veronica knew nothing about that, and again, no reforming took place. So again I state: I don’t get it.

But clearly, in this episode we’re revisiting Veronica’s trust issues. Where does she rate on a scale of one to ten, if a one was “momentarily crazy,” and a ten was “beyond pathological”? Luckily, Veronica learns from Trish’s mistakes of trying to control Kurt’s life, and she pulls back just in time. She too, appears to be on a sliding scale when it comes to how she deals with her insecurities. Let’s hope if Logan ever cheats on her, there is no piano wire in sight! But I must say that Veronica’s apology melted my heart: “I’m sorry, Logan. I spent my formative years watching people while they lied to, cheated on, and betrayed each other, so the trust thing…it doesn’t come naturally. But I’m trying to act unnaturally, I swear. So…there’s that.” She’s really trying.

Kurt owns up to losing the playbook and gets his scholarship rescinded, much to Trish’s dismay. She tells Veronica, “I don’t understand boys. Or football.” And yet, she was dating a football player. Who is a boy. So, we can see why problems might have arisen. Veronica admits she doesn’t understand football either, but “if guys like Kurt are into it, it can’t be all bad.” Veronica needs to decide what kind of guy Logan is, and if his interests are all bad. Trish would have been happy to help Kurt to obtain scholarships (read: control), but Kurt decides that it’s time to be his own man. He tells Trish that when she stole his playbook, her heart was in the right place. But her judgment, unfortunately, was not, and that led to end of their relationship.

Some Questions May Never Be Answered

The episode’s title is “Wichita Linebacker,” a reference to the song “Wichita Lineman,” first made popular by country singer Glenn Campbell. A little Googling netted some interesting facts. It’s been covered numerous times by musicians as varied as Johnny Cash, Ray Charles, and the punk band Urge Overkill. Search YouTube to see some different performances, if you’d like. But is there a reason the episode was named for the song? After all, Kurt could have been from anywhere, it’s not important to the story that he be from Kansas. More Googling uncovered this comment by a fan of the song: “I've always liked the interplay between the lyrics, where the lineman is on one level thinking about his work (‘if it snows that stretch down south won't ever stand the strain’) and on a deeper level about his girl back home (‘I need you more than want you, and I want you for all time...’). Kind of the duel-conversation we have with ourselves from time to time, especially for workmen who work with their hands for a living.” (Source: http://www.songfacts.com/detail.php?id=3894) I think this nicely describes the constant struggle people experience between their professional obligations (like a job or going to school) and their personal ones (such as sports or a significant other). Kurt certainly experienced this struggle. He was being pulled in many directions—having to choose between attending sports meetings and going to class, and being harassed by his coach because his injury made him a waste of a scholarship. Desperate to keep up, he took the playbook out of the athletic complex, and made himself vulnerable to Trish’s pathological behavior.

Trish might be a seven and Veronica may be a four on one scale, but it would require an entirely new scale to rate the members of the Hearst Lampoon and the Lilith House. They are clearly at opposite ends of the spectrum. It’s misogynistic frat boys vs. militant feminists, and stirring the pot is the unsolved case of head-shaving rapist. Dean O’Dell gets involved when his car is vandalized. He brings in both sides for questioning, but suspects the Lilith House of committing the crime. Obviously, we’ve not seen the end of this conflict.

The episode ends with Veronica working once again at the help desk. Logan appears. He asks, “Is this the help desk? Because I need a little help.” They talk. Veronica apologizes. Logan tells her that he passed on the Mexico trip and invites her to, not a booty call, but an actual cultural event that he knows Veronica will enjoy. Another student approaches, echoing Logan, “Is this the help desk?” And Veronica puts up the Closed sign, walking off arm-in-arm with Logan. Veronica is done helping other people, just for a little while.

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