BEST GUEST STAR

§ Well, now, who have we got here?

§ I am Dracula.

§ No kidding. Well wonders never cease. I’ve been paired up with the Dark Prince himself to present the S’cubie Cutie Award for Best Guest Star. How about that.

§ The S’cubies are strange and offputting. But I vill humor them until it is time to enthrall them and drink their blood. Our nominee number vun is Alyson Hannigan as Trina, on Veronica Mars.

§ Trina was a recurring character. Like me. Sweet girl. Next is Norman Mailer, as himself, on Gilmore Girls. Nice, isn’t it? To get nominated for an award, just for being yourself.

§ The next nominee is Daniel Roebuck, as Artz, on Lost. Such a vaste of good blood.

§ Hmmm. This fourth nominee looks familiar: James Marters, as Sam’s dad, on The Mountain. You know - I think he used to play dominoes, in Sunnydale.

§ I have never seen him before in all my unlife, and I do not owe him eleven pounds. The final nominee is Lena Olin, as Irena, in Alias. Very appetizing. I vill find her and make her my bride.

§ Well, before you do that, let’s give the S’cubies their due and find out who the vinn – winner is, shall we?

§ Very vell. The envelope - immediately!