Season 4

Episode 16

 

WHO ARE YOU?:  Behind the Wheel

By Spring Summers  01-Aug-03

 

- Flash forward - Driving & controlSurrendering control - Refusing to be coercedFinding safety & stabilitySelf-respectThe power of loveConclusion - Spicy extras for James Marsters fans

 

From Dirty Girls, Season 7:

 

SPIKE (about the Faith/Buffy body swap): “She [Buffy] told me it went down.  Failed to mention who was driving her skin around.”

FAITH: “I may have said a few things . . . “

SPIKE: “Like you could ride me at a gallop 'til my knees buckle, squeeze me 'til I pop like warm champagne.  That's not the kind of thing a man forgets.”

FAITH: “Should've known it wasn't blondie behind the wheel.  She'd never throw down like that.”

SPIKE: “Oh, you have been away.”

 

But let’s get back to Season 4.  Faith is behind the wheel in Buffy’s body and Who Are You? is filled with images and mention of driving and traveling.  Buffy (in Faith’s body) is driven off by the police, then by Watchers’ Council goons.  Meanwhile Faith (in Buffy’s body) makes plans to leave Sunnydale and is seen at the airport.  Buffy escapes from the goons by driving off in their truck, and later, Giles, Buffy & The Scoobies drive to the church in the same truck.  Faith will escape Sunnydale in the boxcar of a train.  Many references to driving are made:

 

·        JOYCE (about Faith):  “I just don’t understand what could drive a person to that kind of behavior.”

FAITH:  “Well, how do you know she got drove?  I mean, maybe she likes being that way.”

·        FAITH (to Spike):  “I could ride you at a gallop until your knees buckled and your eyes rolled up.”

·        FAITH (to Tara):  “So Willow’s not driving stick anymore.”

·        FAITH (to Riley):  “Maybe we should take you for a test drive.”

·        BUFFY (preparing to escape in the truck): “OK.  I’m good at this.  (wrestling with gearshift) Ohhh!  Drive!”

 

We constantly struggle for control over our destinies, over our journeys through life.  But any control we achieve is temporary and largely illusory.  There is always someone or something waiting to usurp or destroy our thrones – our homes, our families and loved ones, our support systems, our safety, and our security.  Our very identities exist suspended in the most fragile of silk-strung webs.  Many references to “mine and yours” point out the tenuous nature of our individual identities.  The lines between us can be very unclear:

 

XANDER:  “I believe that’s my hey!”

WILLOW:  “Of Buffy’s?”  Uh.  Oh.  This ring.”

 

When we entangle ourselves, when we let what is mine become yours, we become vulnerable and open to takeover.  With Faith’s invasion of Buffy’s body as the central symbol, we see many images of people seizing control.  Some examples:

 

·           In the first scene, Faith takes Joyce’s hand, deliberately raising it so that Buffy can see that she has taken over.  The police seize control of Buffy (thinking she’s Faith), telling Joyce how glad they are that they “finally got the kid.”

·           The Watchers’ Council takes control of Buffy away from the Sunnydale police –they literally take the wheel away from the cops.

·           A vampire has complete control over an intended victim in the alley outside The Bronze (“He was so strong!”), until Faith turns the tables.

·           Vampires take over a church.

·           Riley takes control of the situation outside the church, telling the Sunnydale police to back off - it’s a military operation now.

 

Control?  As the frequent mention of the word “kill” in this episode reminds us, anyone can be dead a moment from now.  You think you have control?  Who are you kidding?  Anything and everything can be snatched away from you in an instant – anytime.

 

But let’s examine another aspect of control by looking at some of the many images of people willingly giving up and losing control:

 

·        Joyce accepts the fact that Buffy doesn’t visit very often, telling “Buffy” that she understands how busy she must be.  Joyce wants more, but she’s plainly willing to take whatever crumbs she can get.  She’s willing to let Buffy control the extent of their relationship, rather than insist Buffy stop hurting her by neglecting her.  She loves Buffy so much she doesn’t want to chance losing Buffy by issuing ultimatums or seeming disappointed.

·        Tara and Willow have this exchange:

TARA:  “Nobody knows I exist, right?  I know all about them, but . . .”

WILLOW:  “Hey.”

TARA:  “I mean, that’s totally cool.  I mean, it’s good.  It’s better.”

WILLOW:  “It’s not like I don’t want my friends to meet you . . . I just kind of like having something that’s just, you know – mine.”

TARA (later in the conversation):  “I am, you know.”

WILLOW:  “What?”

TARA:  “Yours.”

Like Joyce, Tara accepts whatever crumbs she can get.  She turns herself over to Willow; she’s letting Willow drive rather than insisting Willow stop hurting her by hiding the relationship.  She loves Willow so much she doesn’t want to chance losing Willow by issuing ultimatums or seeming disappointed.

·           Faith tells Spike she could completely control him, she could  “. . . have anything.  Anyone.  Even you Spike.”  She could own him; he could be hers just as Tara is Willow’s.  And from the expression on Spike’s face, we can see – yes - she might be on to something there.  We’re pretty sure Spike would do, and let her do, as she says:  “I could ride you at a gallop until your legs buckled and your eyes rolled up.  I’ve got muscles you’ve never even dreamed of.  I could squeeze you until you pop like warm champagne and you’d beg me to hurt you just a little bit more.”  Wow!  Now, that’s what I call driving.  Someday, Spike will let Buffy do all of this - and more - rather than insist Buffy stop hurting him by abusing him and hiding the relationship.  He will love Buffy so obsessively that he will be too afraid of losing Buffy to seriously issue ultimatums or complain.

·           A vampire gang and their leader give up their sewer lair to Adam:  “You can have the place.  I mean, we don’t have to stay here anymore.”  They are afraid of Adam.  Later, despite the fact that Adam has killed one of the gang and seems incapable of mercy, they become enchanted with Adam’s message.  The vampire gang leader says: “Tell us what to do.”  They plainly will do anything for him, and put up with anything from him, in order to remain with him. 

·           In a Christian church, later, we have an image of The Lord and “His people.”  Certainly God can be seen as a being that people continue to follow despite the individual versions of Job’s trials that are inflicted upon each of them.  True believers are uncomplaining and thankful for whatever moments of joy they receive (BUFFY, upon hearing Willow had conjured up a way to re-switch bodies:  “Thank God”).

 

The vampire gang leader, when we first see him, is suggesting to the others that they wait until the night is less crowded, so they can safely pick a drunken straggler as a victim.  This is an image of letting fear control your decisions, but it also points out that being alone makes humans vulnerable.  The images we see of people ceding control are also images of people just being human; they are trying to meet their needs.  They need food or clothing or shelter or love or all of the above.  As many uses of the words “afraid” and “fear” underline (ADAM:  “What is the thing you fear?”), human needs make people vulnerable to being hurt, abused, neglected or controlled by others.

 

But we also get an image of people refusing to be coerced into ceding control.  Buffy turns the tables on a Watcher goon named Smith when she captures him:  “How about this, I’ll be quiet, and you can scream!”  She threatens to kill Smith unless the others (Collins and Weatherby) release her.  But Collins and Weatherby aren’t vulnerable to the takeover attempt, because they aren’t emotionally invested, or particularly concerned, in whether Smith is alive or dead.  They comment that each of them puts their affairs in order before going on this sort of mission – they are prepared to die.  So it seems the cost of retaining control, of being invulnerable to blackmail, is dehumanization, hardening yourself.  That’s the image we see here, and it is certainly one that also describes Faith’s M.O.  She gets through life, protects herself from hurt, by not caring:

 

FORREST:  “You really care what I think?”

FAITH:  “No.  I don’t care.  God, I don’t care.”

 

Many, many references to safety, to stability and to being hurt emphasize the reason Faith is so tough:  She has an overwhelming desire to avoid pain and find security.  Here are a few examples of the references to safety, stability, and pain:

 

TARA:  “Well, you should be safe.”

 

Like the Watcher goons, Faith has chosen to harden herself to avoid pain and protect herself.  She prefers it to allowing herself to be hurt, the way Joyce and Tara are allowing Buffy and Willow to hurt them.  Faith believes these are her only two choices.  But are they, really?  Must she be Tara, who retains her softness and ability to love and feel - but puts up with Willow hiding her from her friends?  Or otherwise, must she continue to be like Collins and Weatherby, who stay in control, impervious to pain, but have lost a good portion of their humanity?

 

No.  Those aren’t Faith’s only choices, as she learns in her encounter with Riley.  But Faith has believed in her “I’d rather be tough than be a goody-two-shoes wimp” philosophy for so long, that she is profoundly disturbed and confused by her encounter with the imperturbable - but still very human - Riley. 

 

What happens when Faith encounters Riley?  Faith, as Buffy, tries to take control of the sexual encounter with Riley.  But he isn’t vulnerable to her kinky come-ons.  He loves Buffy, and he takes a simple, honest, loving – and irresistible – approach to dealing with “Buffy’s” unappealing suggestions.  There are no ultimatums, no games.  Riley simply knows what he wants.  He has self-respect, and standards.  He’s interested in sex with Buffy, but not so desperate or needy that he’s willing to do things her way because he’s afraid she’ll say no otherwise. 

 

Riley’s combination of strength and tenderness leaves Faith shaken and confused.  It doesn’t fit into her view of the world as The Mayor has defined it - a place where one is a master, or one is a slave.  Her night with Riley puts the final lie to Faith’s long-held, cherished belief that life is always a choice between eating or being eaten, using or being used.

 

Now, Faith has been privy to the better life Buffy has achieved both through the luck of the draw, and through Buffy’s own strength and difficult choices.  In this environment, Faith’s basic human needs have begun to be met.  Through her encounters with Joyce, Riley and others, she experiences true love, trust, high expectations (Willow expecting her to kill the vampire) and genuine appreciation (from the girl she saves:  “Thank you.  Thank you!”). 

 

Joyce’s and Tara’s (and in Season 6, Spike’s) willingness to accept less than they want isn’t just about self-effacement and fear of loss.  Like the Lord’s people, they have trust and faith in the loved one and in the power of love.  It’s about believing – rightly or wrongly – that better days are ahead, about forgiveness, about giving people a chance and letting them make mistakes (and we see many images of people making mistakes and misunderstanding each other, but getting past that – e.g., GILES:  “Look, I know what you’re going to say.”  BUFFY:  “I’m Buffy.”  GILES:  “All right.  I didn’t know what you were going to say.”).

 

Like Buffy reacting to being injected with a sedative, or Spike flinching at the pain from the chip, Faith responds to the internal infusion of warmth she receives from Buffy’s friends and family.  The feelings and realizations that begin coursing through her veins disturb and frighten her, just as Joyce’s hug did.  She heads to the airport to try to leave behind the confusion of this painful growth; after so long in the dark, the light from above is hurting Faith’s eyes.  But it’s too late.  It’s in her system, now.  She has begun, irrevocably, to change, to climb toward that very light, despite the pain.  Listen to her exchange with Riley outside the church:

 

RILEY:  “I don’t want you risking-“

BUFFY:  “I’m Buffy.  I have to do this.”

RILEY:  “Then I’m coming with.”

BUFFY:  “I can’t use you.”

 

This is how she is feeling – that she has become Buffy.  That - for all her mocking of Buffy in the mirror earlier “It’s wrong!” and teasing of Spike “Because it’s wrong!” - she has actually begun to discover the significant difference between right and wrong.  And though her words to Riley are, on the surface about going into the church alone, they also point out the fact that she has realized that she “can’t use” Riley.  He’s not like all the men she’s used before.  And amazingly, his love for Buffy and his confident, kind, patient nature are what protect Riley from being used.  What a revelation for Faith, who has always protected herself by not caring and by using her fists.

 

Faith goes into the church a changed woman.  She’s very much like Buffy in her sassy approach to the bad guys, and she battles evil with all she’s got.  Then, she is suddenly confronted with an image from her very recent and unhappy past – her body, with Buffy inside.  The Faith she loathed and tried to leave behind stands before her.  Faith explodes, beating her own face bloody while trying to deny its existence:  “You’re nothing, you’re nothing!!” (that word – nothing – is a word very much connected to Spike, and of course, we’re going to see this “beat your own dark side to a pulp” scene again, with Buffy beating Spike, in Season 6’s Dead Things).

 

But growing and maturing and becoming the best person you can be isn’t as simple as excising your dark side.  That’s a fool’s errand anyhow, because exorcism is not an option.  The road to a happy and successful adulthood requires one to love, accept, integrate and harness the power that dark side.  Faith cannot leave any part of herself behind, any more than Buffy can, anymore than any of us can.  There is no easy, painless way to the light.  Leading a successful life isn’t about being in control of every situation.  It’s about taking responsibility rather than control.  (ADAM:  “I know why I’m here.  I was created to kill.  To extinguish life wherever I find it.  And I have accepted that responsibility.”)

 

In the final scene, Buffy – back in her own body - is faced with a test of her love of Riley.  Can she be OK with the mistake he has made, sleeping with Faith?  What does it mean, that he didn’t realize it wasn’t Buffy, and that he claims, even now,  “I slept with you.”  Is she more than a body to Riley?  Can she give him another chance, trust him again, and get past this? 

 

We leave both Buffy and Faith - separate, but always together, always connected – with some important decisions to make as they begin new phases of their lives, older and wiser from their time in each other’s skin.

 

Spicy extras for James Marsters fans

 

·           I’m not sure about Spike, but my knees are about to buckle when I watch the Spike-scene in this episode.  What a great, subtle acting job by James.  We can see his hesitation and suspicion, his surprise, and his anger – all in his face, all in those few seconds “Buffy” has him backed up against the post. 

·           We can also see Spike’s arousal.  Hold on Ladies!  No need to rush back to your DVD.  I mean we can see his arousal from the look on his face.  (Sorry!)  But just that look is enough to make me gulp.  He looks so . . . ready.

·           Here are some interesting lyrics from the song that plays while “Buffy” tells Spike about the way she’s could squeeeeze him – the singer is singing of watching himself.  From Watching Me Fall by The Cure:

Yeah I’ve been seeing them strip to the bone in the mirror on the wall

Seeing her swallow him whole like it’s not me at all

She holds out her hands and I follow her down to my knees

And the sucking inside insatiable smiles

“You will forget yourself in me . . .”

·        There is some major foreshadowing going on in the Spike scene.  Everything “Buffy” says to Spike will come to pass. 

·        Spike tells “Buffy”:  “I get this chip out, you and me are gonna have a confrontation.”  And of course, once he can hurt her again, once they are on equal footing again, he and Buffy will, indeed, have a major fornication – uh, I mean, consummation – I mean confrontation!! 

·        From Spike’s perspective, this is the first overt, sexual move either party has ever made on the other.  Up until this scene, except for the minor “hello, cutie,” neither Spike nor Buffy has never acknowledged a sexual attraction to the other. 

·        Yep.  Talk about driving – Faith gets Spike’s motor running, and steers him right to the nearest, steepest, downhill slide.  There ain’t no stopping him now.  This moment begins to change Spike’s behavior toward Buffy, culminating in his early Season 5 realization that he doesn’t loathe and detest Buffy after all – he’s in love with her.  And everything proceeds from there.

·        Faith picks up immediately on Tara and Willow’s connection, and it doesn’t take her long to realize that, as Buffy, she can mess very effectively with Spike’s mind, body and soul (OK, strike that last one).  She’s a lot like Spike in both her outsider and dark side status, and in her ultra-sensitive and very observant nature.

·        The way Faith poked Riley in the ribs reminded me very much of the way Spike will poke Buffy in her injured side, during their pool game in Fool For Love.